The Confidence Roller Coaster

Let me just say that I am one of the most optimistic and self-confident people you'll ever meet. Except, occasionally, when it comes to my writing.

In the last month my confidence has had as many ups and downs as a good wooden roller coaster. I was ecstatic to finish my first draft, but then I cringed at the writing of the first few chapters. I rewrote them and felt pretty good about myself again, but then came across some more bad writing in Chapter 5. I fixed that and felt strong, reaching a third of the way through and sent out my work to some readers. I'm still waiting for their feedback, but in the meantime I've been reading more about literary agents. If you ever want to test your dedication to writing, just read through the articles in a book like Guide to Literary Agents. There are query letters, networking, pitching, and lots and lots of stats. If I lived and breathed by numbers, I would've quit by now. Thankfully I don't, and when I read advice like, "Make sure to revise your draft before seeking an agent," I start to feel better. Who in their right mind would try to sell their first draft? I wish there was a way to prevent the hordes of "wannabe" writers from those of us who strive to do our best.

Some of the articles even made me reconsider the genre of my book. Sure, maybe series aren't great for every genre, but in fantasy, they're kind of expected. I panicked for a day, thinking I would have to axe five of my six points of view, add Senna's, and make it a romance novel. I have nothing against romance novels, some of my favorite authors write them, but I realized that's not really what I want to do, and a number of successful fantasy/urban fantasy/paranormal writers only have series. I'm sure Robin Hobb wouldn't be where she was today if the Farseer Trilogy had been one book. The same can be said about Anne McCaffrey's Dragonriders of Pern.

Thankfully I decided to keep to my fantasy genre (although I've been trying to decide if it's actually paranormal fantasy or just fantasy, but I have yet to make a decision).

Unfortunately today I came across another chapter that has to be completely rewritten, but there is hope. For some relief I skipped ahead to edit Chapter 17 and barely had to make any changes. I'm currently rewriting Chapter 12, so only a few more chapters to go before my revisions should be less painful.

After that, I finally get to finish my research for Oliver's story, for book two of the Secondworld series. Yes, I made an executive decision to switch the name from Otherworld to Secondworld; too many writers use "Otherworld." If you think "Secondworld" sounds simple, you're right, it is, but you'll soon see that the Fair-folk were less than inventive when it came to naming places...